A story is told of a young man who had left home because his father had worn him out with the constant Dos and Don’ts. He wanted to live his own life free from the ‘rules and regulations’ from his father. He left home in search of a better life and ‘freedom’. One day he was invited for a job interview. When he arrived there,he found the gate wide open so he shut it. He found a tap open and water flowing freely,he turned it off. The night lights were still on so he switched them off.
When he got into the boardroom, the panelists informed him that he had been hired. They said he had the one skill they were looking for: Responsibility.
Without realising it,the young man’s father had instilled some values in him which he followed subconsciously.
Now I am like the young man today. You see growing up in the village meant that some things had to be done;lock up the chicken,wash your legs before going to sleep,put away the axe in the store and so many other activities. Failure to do those things warranted a beating. And mothers in our days didn’t come to play.
I don’t if like me you ever questioned if your mama was your real mother after she has whipped you a good one.😂 I did not once not twice.
It didn’t help matters that naturally as human beings we are born stubborn and so many times I wrestled(not literally) with my mum as she insisted that I must do this or that. I answered questions with questions. I always asked,’Why??’. The one I remember most was asking why I must wash my own feet when going to bed,they are my feet right??? What’s the big deal? Needless to say,it always earned me a lecture or a beating.
I longed to move away from home so that I can do what I want. And so when I left for university at 18,I moved out into my own house. I remember though my mother always told me that she won’t get tired of repeating the Dos and Don’ts because she knows that my mind will retain something.
Well,I am an adult in my mid 20s now with my own house to manage and life. Phew!!! The freedom that I longed for now must be accompanied with responsibility. The very responsibility that I fought when I was younger.
More often than not,I call my mother and I tell her how am struggling to cope with some of the things and she will give advice and direction but she will not fail to mention that she always told me about it.
Ladies and gentlemen,I came face to face with the hard reality that my childhood or rather our childhood was a training ground for the real life we were going to experience as adults. I now know that those small acts of responsibilities; cleaning after yourself,washing the dishes,clearing the table,putting away stuff and others are an act of strengthening our muscles for discipline and self drive. These skills we will require in our workplaces,businesses,church,family,homes and everywhere we will go.
Had I known that earlier,I’d not have been so stubborn! Not that I was a difficult child but facing my stubborn reality is not a nice experience.
Truth be told,the qualities you harness shape you. Actually,you are a sum total of your upbringing,your experiences and exposure. You might also add,the people you meet.
Now looking back,my mother was moulding me to be a responsible,disciplined and self driven woman. She did a good job because even when I am alone and no one is watching me,there is mischief I will not engage in,there are things I must do. Notably,I switch off the lights when going out of a room and I wipe my shoes. Am I struggling? Yes,with folding my laundry on time.
If I were to write everything my mother taught me I’d not finish since I’d write something new everyday. I know this for sure, that our parents have tried to instill in us values which we can use in our everyday life because there will come a time when they will not be here to give us direction.
My mother’s greatest lesson has been,” Wambui,I’ll keep repeating things to you over and over even if I wear you out because I know even if you forget everything,your mind will retain something.”
Everyday,I remember something she said or did and I apply it be it at work or in my house.
Today,I am challenging you who is still under the care of your parents or guardians to listen and adhere. Don’t be too stubborn. Take all the advice you hear and remember this.
You don’t get advice because you really need it now,you might need it in the future. Store up wisdom for tomorrow. ~ Wambui’s Mother
And for us finding navigating the murky waters of adulthood, may we teach our children or those in our care the value of the instruction. May we be found responsible adults.
Blessings,
Wambui M.R.
(I’d love to hear lessons from your parents or childhood or some of those things you now realise their worth as an adult)
My Mama
Wambui Muriuki 